Monday, March 26, 2007

Just because I'm crafty doesn't mean I'm obligated to take on YOUR craft project...

I log into my email this morning and with the first thing I read I become disgruntled. We all have friends and family that fall into a few different categories. There's people who you're close to, people who you're not that close to. There are those that you'd help out in any way possible because you know they truly appreciate what you do. Then on the flip side of that there are those people who are just looking for someone else to take on their craft project that they volunteered to do and have no intent of doing themselves so are searching for someone to do it for them.

Yep, you guessed it...the email that I received was the last example. I shouldn't even feel disgruntled because by now I should expect this out of this individual.

"I know it's the last minute and I have this hat that I need to put together for a bachelorette party this weekend. I have ideas but I don't know how it should go together. Can you do it for me and I'll take you out for dinner or drinks?

Ummm, in a word, NO. But, I've got to be nice. In my nice email back I just say I really have too much already going on this week (It's true, I do. I've got fabric to cut up to make pillow case kits for a sewing day at the library on Saturday, I've got 44 pillow cases to iron to turn in on Saturday, CPR class tomorrow night after work, Bowling Wednesday night) But of course, the guilt factor kicks in and I feel the need to explain all of this even though I shouldn't have to. I do however offer to chat about the project on the phone or through email regarding any questions she has about putting it together. Why does it seem that I'm obligated to feel guilty for not being able to complete a project that isn't my own? I mean, really. Sure I'm crafty but I've never put a hat together unless you count the gaudy 4th of July hat I once made in my grade school years for a family "Most Patriotic Hat" contest. Lots of hot glue, sparkles and pipe cleaners. I'm sure that's NOT what she has in mind. But on the other hand, just how hard is it to glue some Tulle to a baseball cap? But why should I be asked to be the one doing the gluing?

Why does it always seem that I'm the "uncrafty persons" first step before trying it themselves? Sure, it's flattering that they all seem to think I'm some miracle worker when it comes to crafts. Truth be told, I'm not nor do I pretend to be or want to be. I just put a lot of time into the things that I do and they're only seeing the end result, not the hours it took to get me there.

Now that it's down on "paper" I feel a little bit better. Thanks for "listening" to my insane ramblings of a crafty person!

Monday, March 26, 2007 - Untitled Comment
Posted by 51050 (
I totally know what you mean! Do you ask your friend who is a great cook to come over and make dinner when you're having friends over? Of course not. So why do they think you should want to do their craft project? It's like that's a different category and you should be honored to be asked to do their work. I don't mind when someone is really in a bind through no fault of their own, but there is one friend who asks every so often. I try to be very gracious too. sometimes I do it, sometimes not. It is good just to vent sometimes, isn't it?

Monday, March 26, 2007 - Untitled Comment
Posted by Cre8tiveQuilter (
51050, you said exactly what I was having a hard time putting into words. It's like you should be honored that they asked you. And that's exactly it...I wouldn't say, "hey I'm having a party, can you cook for it?" I'm glad I'm not the only one who this happens to!

Monday, March 26, 2007 - So hard to say NO!
Posted by mamanance (
Jen, it really is hard to say "No" isn't it? I've agreed over the years to do several things that I absolutely wish I hadn't done, but at the time I was afraid I guess to say that little 2-letter word. And still, on the occasions when I do I find that I want to explain too much about why I just can't do it. Couldn't I just say I don't want to and be done with it? I do think it gets easier with practice - maybe eventually that guilty feeling goes away too??? Good for you in sticking to your guns!!!

Tuesday, March 27, 2007 - Untitled Comment
Posted by orchidlover (
I'm with you all on this one. i had a 'friend' who i helped out with kids fancy dress costumes and party dresses. Once i couldn't make anything for a party as i was ill and after being told that it was MY fault her kids didn't win the fancydress contest has never spoken to me since. Not that I'm bothered but believe me it's alot easier to say no in the beginning and let them know where you stand than do it begrudgingly all the time love and hugs gina xxx

Tuesday, March 27, 2007 - Untitled Comment
Posted by scissorhandscps (
I understand where your coming from. I don't mind helping out someone in a pinch but when it becomes repetative it gets old. And you shouldn't feel guilty, all the great things you are doing for people, you spare time is used for eating and going to the bathroom :0) LOL Cindy

Tuesday, March 27, 2007 - Untitled Comment
Posted by lori (
oh my let me put my two cents in ,I can do one better ,I know a person who is for ever encouraging me to go to different class's ( I really do enjoy learning new things ) the next thing I know this person is phoning to ask if I can show her how to do what I have just paid to learn .( Money is not a problem for her ) I'm getting to see why LOL .I never was a person who could say NO but I have learn to talk my way out of it in the last few months .

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